A Complete And Total Lack Of Glory


I’m at a big convention.  Bigger than the last one.  Which apparently means “no more of that free lunch thing”, which I gotta tell ya, is not good.  Leads directly to an unhappy Task.  Here, check it out: 8 (

See? Unhappy.  So to get lunch I’d hafta stand in a line somewhere.  During which time all the software I’m monitoring might stop working and I wouldn’t be able to do anything about it because I’m standing in line for some chicken lumps.  Fortunately, I haven’t had a problem just skipping lunch.  The secret is a really good breakfast that allows you to totally turn up your nose at what would clearly be an inferior repast.  That, and a general disinterest in food in general.  That part might be tough for some people from what I hear.

It’s not all bad news though!  Very conveniently located in our booth is the second most awesome thing I’ve seen at this convention:

He makes coffee, she makes cookies.  Yay!

That’s right, a coffee barista and fresh-baked chocolate chip cookies! Like, right next to each other! And totally free for the asking!  Plus white chocolate onna stick.  If you like that kind of thing.  I assume all white chocolate is totally gross so I haven’t gone near it.  The coffee barista will also make a Cinnamon Chai Latte, which is totally awesome.

Did you notice that big wall behind them?  Looks like a little room behind them?  Yeah, that’s where I’m at about 90% of the time.  This is my “action station”:

Even less interesting than it looks

That little tiny screen in the middle of the picture is my server/network monitoring station.  That’s where I watch to make sure that our software is running perfectly.  Which it does.  As long as I’m there it can give four nines.  Another day of testing and development on it and it’ll be able to give five nines without my presence.  But we ain’t there yet, so here I sit.

About 10 feet away is the coolest thing at the convention, which is also part of the booth I’m in:

I shall detail all the ways in which this is awesome.

What this is, is a 10 player video game.  You sit in one of those captains chairs and pick up the iPad in front of you that has a steering-wheel-shaped plastic holder around it.  That guy standing on the left is the announcer, he’s there to draw attention and to add colourful commentary during gameplay.  The reason the whole area is blue is because they’ve got lots of blue floodlights above this section.  Notice how the lighting is normal everywhere else.  Once they’ve got some people sitting down, they pull the blue curtain around the whole area.  Blue curtain, blue light, it’s all there to give you the feeling of being underwater.  Then everyone is driving their little one-man sub under a glacier and picking up some molecule and avoiding other molecules and ice and there are boost pads and slowdown pads and quiz questions at every checkpoint.  At the end, everyone gets a score and it tracks the highest score of the day.  You can come back later and enter the same 3 initials to try to better your score.

The game itself is nothing special.  It’s very simplistic, kinda weak even, but the SHOWMANSHIP involved in this whole setup! That is what makes it the best thing I’ve seen here.

The bad news of course is that I had absolutely nothing to do with this software.  Not me, not my company, we weren’t even asked.  We’re not up to this level yet.  But this time next year? We might be.

Nope, no glory here.

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About J West

AKA "Task", a software developer. Hence, TaskWare.
This entry was posted in Trip To New Orleans and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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